It is important to have friends – especially as we age!
It turns out that good healthy friendships contribute to good physical health. Friends can decrease your risk of health issues like diabetes, heart attack and stroke. Friendships decrease the feelings of loneliness, which can shorten your lifespan (verywellmind.com).
Since moving from the big city of Kenosha to a small town in the country of less than 60 residents, it has been hard to make new friends. I think I’m a pretty easy going, interesting, friendly person to meet.
So, this is an area I am working on – making new friends here!
My husband has lived here all his life. We met on a dating app in our late 40s. In a small town, everybody knows each other, and about anyone I met, was through my husband, and many of his friends were also friends with his ex-wife, and I am not from around here. I think a reason I’ve had a hard time making friends is some people may have felt awkward about being friends with both of us. I think that because I had friends who would ask me if it’s ok to invite my ex-husband to events, because they are friends with both of us, they did not want to make either one of us feel awkward. I am grateful that my ex and I get along very well. Things are getting better as people get to know me, but most of them are acquaintances, or work friends. I don’t have the having coffee, let’s go to a movie or going out to lunch friends. I need to stop feeling weird about who knows who and just start inviting people I have met to lunch – they might think “boy, that’s the last time I have lunch with her”, or they might really like me – and that is ok, and who knows, I just might form new lifelong friendships!
I have an amazing husband! We travel and do so many fun things together all the time, but it is also just as important and healthy to have “couple friends” to do things with. Studies show that the company we keep outside of our romantic relationships is essential for our overall well-being. Doing things with other couples actually strengthens your relationship! (Psychcentral.com). We need to get on the ball of inviting other couples to do things with too!
Bren's Zen Journey 