
Most of my life has been spent worrying about what other people thought of me, looking for approval, not feeling good enough, not pretty enough and feeling like I have not succeeded in anything. I think I’m a pretty friendly person. I always try and make a conscious effort to think about what I say, and I do my best to motivate others and help when I can. I’ve always believed that everyone is a beautiful soul, everyone deserves happiness and to be loved. I just had a hard time believing that when it came to me!
Sometimes I let my feelings and hurt get the best of me. In my sixty years of life, I have had some pretty weird rumors about me, some really funny and out of this world, and some really hurtful. I’ve been blocked on social media and probably on phones too. I’ve been made to feel bad for things I believe in and for my life choices. I’ve even had my HIPPA laws broken by someone I know! I would leave a lot as is, because I always try to think about how my actions would affect the other people in my life. So, things got left unheard and undone. My father used to say “crying and thinking about what you did or say, won’t change anything. Say your sorry and move on, when you say sorry, you at least acknowledge to the the person you hurt, that you know you did something wrong”. The sad thing is some people think only of themselves, and instead of admitting wrong, think of every excuse to feel right.
Now after six decades, and I don’t know why it took me this long, believing in me and avoiding self-pity is a big goal! I have decided to discover more about who I am, what makes me happy, and what makes me tick, what is my purpose in this life, and doing things to please me first! Believing in myself has always been difficult, and it is a lesson I am still learning, and realizing is an ongoing journey.
As we enter new seasons of life, we often uncover amazing truths about ourselves, which some may take us by surprise. 60 for me is a time to reflect on me, to treat myself first, not to stress out or care about what other people think, to believe that I can accomplish whatever I want, and accepting if things don’t go as planned, try a new adventure, or a new idea. Meditation and reflection has really helped me focus to see that I am special, I have more people who love and appreciate me than those who do not. I have come to my realization that people who talk, block, lie, etc. do it because they are jealous and that is a pretty great feeling that people are so envious!
I am extremely grateful for my husband, who I know loves me and thinks I am the most beautiful creature on earth. I am grateful for my kids who I can talk to about anything, and can make me laugh. I am grateful for the friends from my past and the new ones I’m making. These people in my life are the perfect recipe for me to believe in myself!
“You may be the only person left who believes in you, but it’s enough. It takes just one star to pierce a universe of darkness. Never give up.”
Richelle E. Goodrich







